With a little tweaking, I could be happy EVERY day!

Have you ever had one of those days where a lot of little things go wrong, right in a row? The kind of day where even though you handle things better than you normally would, you're still not happy about the way things are going; where you're kind of floating through on a wispy cloud of hope, praying that tomorrow will give you a few more reasons to smile; where while you probably wouldn't call it a bad day, it certainly doesn't fit into the good-day category either?

I had a day like that yesterday.

The morning started out in an unspectacular fashion. I had slept badly because Millie had slept badly, Adam was away on a fishing trip, there were three tons of dirty dishes in the sink mocking me, and my jeans felt tight. By nine thirty, I was already so apathetic about life that I cleaned up the flood in the bathroom without harsh words or threats towards the boy, the three plastic sharks, and the squirt gun that had caused it. I was in such a funk that I couldn't work up enough fury to tell off the lady who stole my grocery cart at Walmart. (I know she saw me walk into that bathroom with two kids, though. She even smiled at me! But when she left the restroom before me because she wasn't burdened down with a screaming one-year-old and a five-year-old who couldn't make up his mind which stall to pee in even though he was seconds away from doing it right there on the floor, did she leave me the cart with functional straps so that I could at least immobilize my screamer? She did not.) After the shopping trip, it took me over an hour and a half to put away six bags of groceries. That's how much I didn't care whether things got done or not. While I worked on the seemingly insurmountable task of finding where to stash the Chlorox wipes, my kids ate leftover lunch scraps off the dirty kitchen floor. I shrugged my shoulders and left them to it. Later, I let them pull all the couch cushions off and beat each other senseless while I watched Star Wars. And then, to top it all off, we had breakfast for dinner. I don't even like breakfast for breakfast! But pancakes are easier than tuna casserole.

It wasn't until the kiddos were snug in their beds that I had this unexpected epiphany: at no point during this day had I felt overly hurried, stressed, or inadequate. A little blah, maybe, but not crazed. Do you know how infrequently that happens in my life? I'll tell you. Very infrequently! If I could figure out how to have a day like yesterday and be in a good mood, do you know what would happen? I could become that annoyingly cheerful woman you see around town who never yells at her kids or snaps at her husband. I could consider having more children without going into hysterics. I could have balance in my life. I could rule the entire world!! (And let's be honest, I would totally rock at that job.) But do you see the possibilities? They are endless.

I always knew I was a genius.


P.S. I miss you all! Give me another month and things will start to get back to normal. In the meantime, quit writing so many stinking posts!! I'm four hundred behind as it is.