Hear, hear!

As a middle child, it goes against my entire philosophy of life to say that in this world, things are pretty much fair. But I think it might be true. Maybe not in day-to-day things, but if you look at the big picture, the universe tends to even things out. It's why high school geeks end up with totally hot spouses. I'm telling you, I'm on to something here...

So here's the deal. I have no sense of smell and my sense of taste is mildly compromised as a result. I wear contacts with a prescription of -7.50. (In case that means nothing to you, take a pencil and draw a circle on a Post-it. Hold it at arms length. Now imagine you can't see the circle. At all. That's how well I see without contacts.)

It is for these reasons that I truly believe the universe will let me keep my hearing, even when I'm old and grey and all my friends are croaking, "Eh, what's that? Speak up, sonny!" And it's why I can say with 100% certainty that my ears were not deceiving me when I heard the boy in front of me at Fred Meyer turn to his mother and say, "Hey, girl. What time is Melrose Place on?"

Okay. Maybe 98%.